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Jenny Craig members: why are you still so fucking fat? ....................................................... NAAFA chair Leslie DiMaggio (above) is fucking huge too. Dear Leslie DiMaggio and other Jenny Craig members, .....I tell you, if I masturbated into a pillow every time I saw a 400 lb person eating, I'd have a lot of sticky pillows! You fat bastards are sure fucking fat! I know you always say that they can't stop eating, but you know what shitface? I CAN'T STOP EATING EITHER! It's called "my body needs food to live!" But the difference is, when I eat, I eat a regular fucking meal instead of eight chocolate bars and a tube of liquified horse meat. What's that? You wonder why I'm so thin? WELL, IT'S BECAUSE WITH YOU EATING, THERE'S NOTHING LEFT FOR ME! FUCK YOU, YOU PIECES OF SHIT! ..... I'm sorry, that was rude. I did not mean to be as vulgar as a cat fisting a circus bear on a moped (a photo of such an action was unavailable). It just kind of happened, like that time I woke up with my grandmother in the jacuzzi. But you do have to admit that it's true. The world only has so much food, and with you fat assmasters eating all of it, you're leaving behind some rather large dung and dingleberry piles...and the people at Macy's are still rather upset at you for it....oh, and Montgomery Wards doesn't want you trying out their scales anymore. You giant buttchunkling whales. ..... But in conclusion, I don't want to have sex with you. Yes, I know fat people have big breasts, but it's really hard to tell which part of you actually is the breast. So no. Not even if you play with my sack. Sorry. Sincerely thin, Paul Ryan 
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