Who the hell is Ron Barron?
He's a teacher at my old high school.
Why is he being featured on this website?
Because he's pretty.
No, really. Why is he being featured?
Look at him. He's awesome. His glasses are awesome, his hair is awesome, and his ears are big, just like Paul's. Being like paul is pretty awesome.
Damn it, did you run out of column ideas again?
Um . . . no. No, not at all. Don't you think he's pretty?
What the hell? Write me a humor column, you lazy bastard!
No! We're not here to read a humor column today! We're here to talk about Ron!
FINE. What's so interesting about Ron?
He says "on there" a lot. You know how some people say "um" a lot when they're talking, and other people add the word "like" to every sentence? Well Ron does that, except instead of "um" or "like", he says the phrase, "on there". For instance, he'll be teaching in class, and he'll say, "The meaning of the soliloquy is clearly shown in the fourth line on there." He'll just add "on there", for no reason whatsoever. Sometimes he'll pause for many seconds, trick you into thinking he won't add "on there" to the end of his sentence, and then he'll do it. "Your homework is due Thursday, and you should write four full pages . . . on there."
This is the dumbest crap I've ever read in my life.
That's funny! On there! ON THERE! Look at his picture and imagine him saying it! It's funny!
Where has your sense of pride gone?
I think it's "on there".
We come to this website for humor. Can you please tell us one lousy joke?
Okay, fine. What requires four quarts of vodka a day and still doesn't work? Give up? Corey Feldman.
Um, that wasn't very good.
Well, you said you wanted "one lousy joke".
I hate you so much.
But you don't hate Ron, do you? Don't take it out on Ron, man. He doesn't need your dirty business.
I didn't hate Ron before, but now I do. It's your fault.
No! Don't hate him! How could you hate someone like Ron? Just look at him!
Now he looks like a Halloween mask...
How dare you! Get out of my house, I don't want you here anymore!
First off, you don't own a house. You own an apartment that measures 12 square feet. Secondly, I'm not in your apartment. This is the Internet. I'm in my apartment, naked, switching between your site and buying Oreo cookies on Simondelivers.com.
You shop for groceries on the Internet and have them delivered? You lazy twat!
Write a real column!
Get off your ass and go shopping like a real person!
Shut up, douchebag!
Twatface!
Jerk store!
Oprah droppings!
That's it, I'm leaving!
Good!
And I'm never coming back! Nobody will read your columns now!
Fine! That just gives me more time to watch Thundercats on the Cartoon Network!
Fine!
Fine!
Jimmy Eat World "Pain"
Jimmy Eat World has received a lot of publicity since their last album, and they even have a video for this first single, but their new album is still worth publicizing here on WMS. Amazing guitar riffs are once again the key to the band's album, and impressive ones are found on almost every song. If you love "Pain", you'll love every song on "Futures", the album they released yesterday.
Jimmy Eat World has received a lot of publicity since their last album, and they even have a video for this first single, but their new album is still worth publicizing here on WMS. Amazing guitar riffs are once again the key to the band's album, and impressive ones are found on almost every song. If you love "Pain", you'll love every song on "Futures", the album they released yesterday.
