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Okay, enough of that tomfoolery. We all know that none of the 1.7 women who actually visit this site are going to do that. At least not until someone takes some initiative and starts posting dailyramblings.com stickers all over the walls of Deja Vu, so we can get some strippers to visit the site. Don’t strippers deserve laughter too? So anyway, I drove home from Summerfest today–a boring three and a half hours–and now here I sit, in my apartment, watching fireworks outside my window. (Begin sarcasm . . . now!) It’s the best fireworks show ever. Ooooooh, I’ll bet all my readers would loooooove to see the fiiiiiiiireworks I get to see. Ooooooh, I’ll show them. Let’s ALL enjoy them, shall we?
 Oooooh, look at those!
 Wooooooow, I bet those fireworks cost at least $33!
 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Those ones make me tingle!
 (End sarcasm) God, this is getting boring.
 The fireworks are starting to get blurry . . .
 Oh my God! What the hell is that?!? Shitty photographer! Shitty photographer!
 Bad . . . photography . . . destroying . . . corneas . . . gack! Worst. Fireworks show. Ever. The city of La Crosse can suck my big fat log.
Note: For those of you who missed my other columns from this week (a lot of them were put up later than usual), you can visit them here. Oops! I'm sorry! How'd that get in there? What a shame. Seriously, you can go to the weekly columns section by clicking here.
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Oooooooh, look at me, I can use the word “aftermath” in this column’s title! Oooh, I’m sooooo smart, and soooooooo coooooool too! I’ll bet all the ladies will be soooooooo impressed that they’ll take pictures of themselves with their shirts off and eeeeeeee-mail them to meeeeeeeeee!
