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- Tina Fey doing a Garnier commercial feels . . . wrong.
7 hrs ago - The notary who stamped my form is named Judas. Only in Los Angeles would someone name their kid Judas.
15 hrs ago - I used my phone to make an actual phone call today. It felt weird.
19 hrs ago - If there is a hell, I'm pretty sure it involves compiling Android apps all day.
1 day ago - Kinda wanna bang the girl in the commercial though, just so I could say I did.
4 days ago - 20 years from now, that shitty "education connection" commercial will still be stuck in my head.
4 days ago - New column is up with all new jokes! Unlike my actual life, which is just the same joke played endlessly. http://t.co/XEZKM1ex
6 days ago - I've got some leftover chocolate cake from dinner. I'm going to do that whole Bill Cosby "chocolate cake for breakfast" bit tomorrow.
1 week ago - Not that it matters these days, but if Ferris Bueller is promoting a car, it should probably be an American one since he's an American icon.
1 week ago - Watching USC & UCLA alumni arguing over who has the smartest people is like watching two eunuchs arguing over who has the biggest dick.
1 week ago - More updates...
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